I fought the law and the law won...

My eagerness to return to New Zealand from Australia was dampened somewhat by a combination of run-ins with the Kiwi authorities. Having had some time to kill in Melbourne airport I thought I would buy a comedy pot of Vegemite clasped by a furry Koala bear - after a more than confusing purchase it transpired I had to collect the Aussie tourist tat on the other side of passport control in order to save myself $2 in GST. Upon collection I found myself in the middle of a manic discussion in rapid fire Chinese about the benefits of various shark pill products; in the confusion I quickly handed my receipt over, took my goods, shoved them in my bag and escaped the commotion. That was the last I thought of the whole episode until I was passing through NZ customs, when a over-friendly MAF officer politely informed me he had noticed some jars of food in my bag as it was put through the x-ray machine. I was more than a little surprised to find that the cute little Koala bear with the Vegemite and somehow turned into a Kangaroo holding a pot of honey, thinking I should keep quiet and not admit I didn't know what was in my own bags, the MAF officer then preceded to tell me that the consequences of 'smuggling' illegal foodstuffs (especially the highly dangerous Honey) was a $200 fine. So the upshot of me saving my $2 in tax was a $200 fine; and even my poor maths can work out that wasn't a great investment. All hilarious stuff I can tell you.

At least I was buoyed by the fact that me & Jen were off on holiday to the South Island early next morning to meet up with Neil & Debs, so nothing could dampen my mood...or so I thought. Despite renting possibly the smallest car known to man, I was amazed to see (on a typically empty NZ road) an unmarked Police car flashing its lights at me in my rear view mirror as we were heading down to Kaikora. Apparently I'd managed to squeeze 126kph (78mph) within a 100kph (62mph) zone, despite my protestations of innocence the copper decided to give me a ticket, and the $230 fine that came with it. Oh the hilarity, within 12hours of being back in New Zealand I'd managed to be caught smuggling and speeding and ended up $430 worse off....welcome home!